


Finding Peace: Chris Evans x Reader

by captainofherheart



Category: Chris Evans - Fandom
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Chris Evans Fanfiction, F/M, Panic Attack, chris evans rpf, chris evans x you - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-19
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-04-24 22:08:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14364711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainofherheart/pseuds/captainofherheart
Summary: Chris helps you find comfort when he comes home and finds you struggling with the aftermath of a panic attack. (NOTE: The actual trigger is not mentioned nor do I go into the panic attack itself, this is strictly how the person feels once it’s over)





	Finding Peace: Chris Evans x Reader

Chris entered the bedroom and stopped dead in his tracks once you came into view.  The room dim with only the slightest bit of light permeating through the drawn blinds.  You were laying towards the edge of the bed on top of the comforter, curled up in a fetal position.  Your arms were wrapped tightly around yourself and your body was slightly rocking back and forth, a signal to him that you were self soothing.  

“Are you okay?” he asked in a soft voice that was full of concern.  You started to nod, then changed to shaking your head as a fresh tear slipped down your cheek.  

“What happened?” he asked as he lowered his backpack to the floor.  

You took a deep breath and, slowly, opened your eyes to look his way.  They were sensitive even to the dull light in the room and you had to try a few times before you could manage to get them open even halfway.  The lids were heavy and your eyes were so raw and dry from crying that they felt like sandpaper. Your body was aching and there was a bone deep chill you couldn’t quite shake, but you just didn’t have the energy to get under the covers.  You had just a vague recollection of collapsing onto the bed earlier. 

Your voice was slow and lethargic as you explained, “I got triggered.” You swallowed thickly and sighed as you caught your next breath and continued.  “Panic attack, full force.” Tears began to wet your eyes again and you lifted the crumpled up tissue you had clutched in your hand to wipe them away. “I couldn’t stop it, it just-”  

There was no finishing your thought, a strangled sound came out instead.  You didn’t need to, anyway, Chris understood exactly what you were trying to express.  He reached over the nightstand and plucked out several tissues, bringing them close enough for you to take.  You closed your eyes for a second, nodding slightly in thanks, then wiped your tears and blew your nose. 

Chris took the used tissues from your hand and tossed them into the nearby garbage pail.  He returned to the bed, crouching down beside it to get eye level with you and asked, “How bad?”

“Over an hour.  I don’t even remember getting home.”

“I’m so sorry, honey.”

There was silence for a moment as you held each other’s gaze.  You drew some strength from the empathy and love you saw reflected in his.  “Doing better now?”

“Yeah, I think so. The worst is over.  This is really just aftershocks.” You used the heel of your palm to rub your eye, then ran your fingers through your hair and down your neck, massaging it for a few seconds. “I feel so drained, like I’m hungover.”

“I know the feeling.”

You met his worried eyes and whispered, “I know you do.”

“Can I get you something?  Tea? Draw a bath?”

You looked away from him, lost in thought as another wave of anxiety bubbled under the surface and caused you to shudder.  Your shoulders started hunching inward again.

“Can I hold you?”

Chris knowing to even ask that question was one of the things that you loved most about him.  He understood the struggle, knew that sometimes comfort was needed, but sometimes being touched would set off your fight or flight response and trigger your anxiety all over again.  He never assumed it was okay to get too close and always asked first. 

You nodded and said, “I’d like that.”  Your body was craving comfort.

He stood up  and gently squeezing your shoulder.   “Wait here, I’m going to go set something up for you.  I’ll come get you in a few minutes, okay, love?”

Again, you nodded and he placed a loving kiss against your forehead before walking into the living room.  True to his word, he came for you in less than five minutes and had brought a bottle of water for you, the top already loosened.

You sipped the water as you followed Chris to the living room which was scented with your favorite, calming aromatherapy oil in the diffuser on the end table.  You inhaled deeply as you followed him to the large, sectional sofa. He had a thick, super plush blanket draped over the back of it. He took a seat in the corner and you laid down on your side, placing your head in his lap while facing the gas fireplace he had turned on.  

Chris reached over and pulled the blanket down, arranging it over your body.  Your eyes didn’t leave the flames that were dancing, entrancing you. 

He pulled out his phone and launched soothing, healing, meditation music from YouTube.  You snuggled down deeper, letting your body relax and stretched out. Chris ran his fingers over your scalp and smoothed your hair, letting his hand work its way down to your shoulder before starting the cycle over again. Knowing how much it comforted you he whispered,  “Shhh, shhh, you’re safe.” 

“I love you, Chris,” you murmured with a yawn. 

“I love you, too.”     

Your body finally released the tension, the fear and all the negativity that had been trapped inside of it.  With a sense of peace and calm, you drifted off to sleep. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Panic attacks are real. Anxiety is real. One of the hardest things to overcome is feeling like a prisoner in your own mind. It can be difficult for people who have never experienced an attack to understand that. It’s easier for them to brush it off, be judgmental, or believe it’s “all in your head.” For those of us who do battle them, we know better. It can be isolating, but there is no reason to suffer in silence. There are so many ways to get help. Please don’t be afraid to look for it or accept help when offered. We’re all in this together, you are not alone.


End file.
